It's Tough To Get Along With Those With Opposing Views

Relationships between people are psychologically complex. We are, after all sentient beings with infinitely different identities. What makes us the way we are is coded in our genes and our exposure to the environment. That being said, what is the best way to relate to people? Do we be ourselves, or do we subtly modify our behavior to accomodate others? I seriously doubt that most people act the way they would in private the same way they would act in front of: their spouse, their boss, a friend, their parents, etc. There is always that reservation that keeps us wanting to impress, or not look bad. Perhaps it's the civilized way to behave.

Here's the conundrum that is causing these thoughts tonight: I have family members whose political and philosophical views are in direct opposition to mine. For example, the majority of my immediate family, and relatives on both sides of the family support G.W. Bush. Consequently, they approve of and continue to support the Iraq war, a war that I feel is wrong from a moral, judicial, religious and practical standpoint. They view global warming not as a scientifically sound theory, but rather a liberal conspiracy. They embrace conservative, traditional views while I embrace progressive views. They interpret situations without giving much thought other than what they see and hear on TV (from sources like Fox News, O'Reilly Factor, etc.). In summary, they possess the traits that turn me off to conservatism: close-mindedness, rigidity in beliefs, rejection of the scientific method in favor of gut feeling, and hostility to those who question their beliefs.

So, when I meet with my relatives, there is an unspoken understanding not to engage in political discussion. I try once in awhile just to get some dialogue going, but in the Conservative fashion, I am met with silence. It seems that one does not challenge a conservative's beliefs without getting some spite in return; often in the form of the cold shoulder. Some people would say, "They are your family, family comes first"; or "These political issues should not drive a wedge between you and your family; put them aside." But when you are a person who is concerned about global issues and how they may affect the future, this becomes a problem. It is difficult to suppress the desire to engage. To not speak out is to not be yourself, and it is quite uncomfortable. Sadly, it damages my relationship with my family. It relegates it to a "casual acquaintance" relationship. We talk about superficial things like summer vacation, sports, etc. and leave out the big, important issues. It's almost like we're estranged.

Religion Inaction

Religion is a double-edged sword. It can help a person feel settled and secure. Faith in a higher power is reassuring because it convinces the individual that, despite all the bad things that can happen in life, there is something much greater to look forward to. Faith can help keep a person in line, serving to create a guilty conscience when intentions lean towards wrongdoing. And finally, faith can cause people to be nicer to one another, and to do good deeds.

But here's the problem: religion is an institution created by and comprised of humans. When an institution relies on human participation, it is subject to the fallibilities of man: greed, hypocrisy, and even downright evil. It basically is open to the seven deadly sins, just like an individual being. Take for instance the downfall of leader of one of the biggest Evangelical churches, the Rev. Ted Haggard. He admitted buying metamphetamines from a gay masseuse, who claims they had drug-fueled, gay sex. When he was not committing these acts, he was preaching against gay marriage and homosexuality. He exemplifies my point precisely. The Revs. Jim Baker (extortion and adultery) and Jimmy Swaggart (solicited prostitution) fell years before him.

But one does not have to go to the highest leadership of our religious institutions to make this point. What I want to know is, if all these religious organizations in this country are worshipping the same god, why is it that you don't ever hear of inter-faith fellowships, ministries, or simple get-togethers? We have the Church of Jesus Christ, the Chinese Christian churches, the Korean Christian churces, The Japanese-American Christian churches (by the way, I have attended all of these churches), Catholic churches, Presbyterian, Lutheran, Unitarian churches, Bible churches, Mormon churches, "non-denominational" churches, mosques, and so on. From what I can tell, these churches' congregations, despite sharing in common worshipping God, don't even bother to knock on each other's door to say "hello." They don't take field trips together and pray together. They don't join forces to help those who suffer. What does this translate to? To me, it says that church life is more of a sub-culture than it is a body of worship. People go to church to interact with like-minded people. Then they go home.

What I would like to see is leaders of the major churches, including the pope get together and make a joint statement about the millions of people in the world who are suffering from hunger, poverty and oppression. They should fire up their congregations and fulfill their roles as leaders to urge volunteerism, philanthropy, and altruism. Ask this of the public at large, not just church members. Put a rest to the sin and damnation sermons for a minute, and focus energy on the present situation. Focus on similarities between the multitudes of faiths, not the differences. Create unity. Buy television airtime and put out the message on a mass communications scale. This doesn't violate separation of church and state as long as the government doesn't foot the bill. But alas, I do not see this happening. There is a widening divide between the Muslim and Christian faiths not seen since the Crusades, and our religious leaders are strangely silent. It just proves my point that religion is not what it is made out to be.

So, as long as religious institutions fail to do their jobs, my advice is NOT to discredit faith or abandon the belief in God; but rather, worship and practice your faith on your own, in private. Keep faith that good will prevail over evil. Be wary of false prophets, including clergy members. Look within to find goodness; do your part in spreading it. Say a prayer, and mean it.

The War Against Terror Cannot Be Won

People: Terrorism is an ideology, not a country, not an army. It exists in the minds and hearts of misguided extremists. It is invisible. It has no mass. It cannot bleed. You cannot militarily defeat an idea; it lives as long as the fuel that feeds it remains. So wake up, and change your strategy America.